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We can’t win. If we write what we know, people roll their eyes and tell us we’re inserting Mary Sues. If we write about characters that aren’t at all like us, people suggest we’re acting out our fantasies through our characters. Yes, our experiences and perspectives affect our characters. But most of us are not incapable of realistically portraying characters who think and believe differently.
I have kind of written one story about an asexual person, but I’m not sure if she’s aromantic. She seemed pretty adamant about not dating until she was about eighteen, and then her relationship with a boy she lived with became not really romantic but definitely partnership-ish, and she gets jealous when he spends too much time with other people, but I think we all do that. 🙂
These are all pure win =) And the thing about your writing reflecting your “secret wishes”, guess I know who originated that nugget of wisdom!
O hai, me!
Seriously, I worry about this way too much.
Like, I start out with good intentions, but then I realize nobody will be able to tell that my werewolves have no gender roles and see sexuality as a spectrum and that the commander is gay, because I avoid writing romantic or sexual stuff because all my knowledge is secondhand. Or even thirdhand.
Guess I just gotta man (or woman) up and write more good.
I just read my first Mary Sue story ten minutes ago. Serendipity costs less today, you know. Until an hour ago, I had no idea what a Mary Sue story is, although I’ve made up in my head many of my own.
It occurs to me that many writers have written many Mary Sue stories, and even more are accused of writing Mary Sue stories. For all I know, Adele is your Mary Sue. I’m pretty sure Ivy’s mom isn’t.
Don’t worry about your writing. You write good, and write better sex scenes than Isaac Asimov. Of course, Travis Tea writes better sex scenes than Isaac Asimov, so perhaps I should find a better analogy.