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You know what, I’m pretty proud of the fact that I’ve learned how to deal with criticism. It doesn’t just mean you automatically do whatever people tell you needs to be changed, of course, but sometimes if someone offers criticism, there’s still work you can do so the next person won’t say that. But if you just convince yourself that REALLY the problem is that you’re perfect and everyone else is wrong, you’re going to have very limited opportunities in the future.
Publishers (and editors along the way) aren’t there to squash your soul and chop up your book so it’s unrecognizable. They’re there to help your vision be realized. If you can’t get out of your own way enough to realize it does not necessarily fall out of your pen as pure gold–especially if nobody but you is having that reaction to your material–you won’t develop a healthy understanding of how to make your work better.
It’s difficult to accept valid negative criticism, when it is encased in rhetoric of the “your writing is totally unintelligible, you clearly have no ability and should give up” sort. But although the fruit is bitter – it does nourish.